Report: Fins stick with Sparano

How much torture can Miami football fans take?

After an absurd chain of events occurring over the last few days, the Miami Dolphins have decided to retain head coach Tony Sparano after boldly pursuing Stanford coach Jim Harbaugh among others.

The report was confirmed via twitter by several big names including Jay Glazer of Fox Sports, Jeff Darlington of the Miami Herald, and Chris Mortenson of ESPN.

Meanwhile they still had Sparano under contract through out the wild goose chase in which they also spoke with Bill Cowher and Jon Gruden, who both said no thanks.

It was believed Harbaugh was close to becoming Miami’s next head coach as of Thursday afternoon, after owner Stephen Ross and General Manager Jeff Ireland flew west on Ross’ private jet Wednesday night to meet with him.

Apparently Miami was willing to make him the highest paid coach in football, but I think the sewer stench that is the Dolphins offense was simply too much to bare.

The Dolphins are officially the laughing stock of the league.

They left their head coach dangling by a thread, while Ireland and Ross zipped around in their little plane looking for someone they thought was better. How can the relationship between Sparano and Ross ever be repaired? What about Sparano and Ireland, who closely work together?

Meanwhile, several players including Ricky Williams, Brandon Marshall, and Brian Hartline publicly criticized Sparano’s “micromanaging ways” this week. Even former Dolphin Jason Taylor had some negative words about his former employer.

How can the franchise move forward after this hurricane?

Ross should be embarrassed. Ireland should fear an ass-kicking from Tony. And I might have to watch future Dolphin games with gauze in my ears and a blindfold over my eyes.

Ross thought he could just throw money at the situation and it would all go away. Well, there’s more to it than that, Steve. Where’s the business savvy that made you a multi-billionaire?

If you’re going to go after another coach hard, while keeping your current coach on, you better make damn sure you’re going to get him, or someone. This is especially true considering your fan base is fed up with the current regime.

Regardless of where Harbaugh ends up, he clearly jerked Ross around Jenna Jameson style. If I remember correctly, Jon Gruden and the Miami Hurricanes underwent a similar roller coaster a few weeks ago.

But don’t worry fans, the same boring old offense will take the field next year, probably led by Chad Henne, because as Tony Sparano said last week, “He’s mentally tough.”

Mr. Ross, regardless of whatever pregame or halftime circus you have planned next year, I wish you no luck in trying to fill those big, bright orange seats.

You couldn’t pay me to take season tickets next year and I mean that with all my heart.

No comments yet.

Leave a Reply